I miss the water. Don’t get me wrong - I am grateful to be back in a home on land, but there was something about being surrounded by water that soothed my soul. The weeks following the storm I was repeatedly drawn to the lake. I found myself driving out of my way to the marina just to sit in my car and look at the water. In these moments, even though our world was upside down, I felt peace.
Going to the lake on a daily basis is out of the question, so I decided to bring the water to me. First, I got a water bed. (Not really, as I am pretty sure they stopped making those in the nineties, but I did consider it…) A pool is out of the question because it requires a yard (which we don’t have), so instead, I bought a little fountain for my bookshelf. Not quite the same, but it will probably fill the void, right?
In a soul-searching moment this past weekend, God showed me that my longing for water has less to do with the lake and everything to do with Jesus. The lake had become a place of escape. A place where I could meet with God because I expected to find him there. A place of peace in the midst of life’s storms. That is, until life’s storms became more than just a metaphor and we found ourselves out of a home, sharing a rental with friends, living out of suitcases, planning a major women’s ministry event and planting a church. In the chaos, I longed for the water because my spirit was dry.
Then, a few weekends ago, my dry spirit found living water all over again. In spite of our demanding schedules and never ending to-do list, we packed our bags and headed to Tucson for a special retreat. The invitation had come months ago and I knew even then that we were meant to go. The event was hosted by Pastor Zane Anderson, his wife Jan and their amazing team. The entire weekend we were pampered, poured into and prayed over. The Holy Spirit showed up in a powerful way and God’s Word spoke directly to our soul. I took 25 pages of notes and cried too many tears to count. Most of the truths that I frantically jotted in my journal were personal and I’ll keep those little treasures for myself. However, there was one verse that Pastor Zane spoke over us that I want to share.
Isaiah 43:19 says, “See I am doing a new thing! Now it springs up; do you not perceive it? I am making a way in the desert and streams in the wasteland.” God is doing a new thing! Through a rough few years of obstacles and transitions, my spirit was dry. I longed for the lake, partly because that’s where my season of restoration took place. And even though Lake Pleasant will forever hold a special place in my heart, it became clear to me: True peace doesn’t come from a place. John 4:14 says, “But those who drink the water I give will never be thirsty again. It becomes a fresh, bubbling spring within them, giving them eternal life.”
I’ve finally come to terms with the fact that my $9.99 water fountain from Walgreens won’t fill the void. When I have a void in my life, a wound that needs healed, or a spirit that needs refreshed Jesus is the answer.
He is the living water!